Your inner child is simply a younger version of yourself that lives on inside you. You have many different younger versions often referred to as inner child parts – baby parts, toddler parts, school age parts, teenage parts etc.

Your child parts hold the happy moments, dreams and desires as well as all the hurt, trauma and painful memories from your past that wound these younger versions of yourself.

Wounded inner child parts negatively influence who you are in your life as an adult, holding enormous power over your relationships and decisions.

When your inner child feels safe and seen it’ll allow you to blossom & thrive in life. You’ll get the green light to grow, expand & try new things. You’ll deal with minor amounts of shame without getting gobbled up with fear. You won’t get stuck in the pursuit of getting approval from others. You’ll tolerate mess ups or failure without distress.

But when your inner child is wounded it will hold you back in life causing you to feel anxious and fearful with feelings of shame, guilt and unworthiness. A wounded inner child wants your attention - It wants to be seen, heard, and acknowledged. A wounded inner child is asking you to take moment to pause, connect and listen deeply to its needs, to see its pain & comfort it with compassion.

When your wounded inner child is validated your adult self will feel calmer, happier, more confident and content in your own skin. It's the wounded child parts that are the focus of healing work.

“The cry we hear from deep in our hearts, comes from the wounded child within. Healing this inner child's pain is the key to transforming anger, sadness and fear”
- Thich Nhat Hanh

There are obvious ways that your inner child becomes wounded.

• Physical Abuse

• Sexual Abuse

• Neglect

• Death of a parent

• Separation of parents

• Traumatic accidents

If you didn't experience any obvious wounding it can be easy to look back and think 'I had a perfect childhood - everything was great' & believe you're not wounded. But no human is perfect and everyone is therefore raised imperfectly.

Even the most loving parents may not have given you the validation and support you desired at all times in your childhood. You were most likely wounded at some stage by adults because they missed seeing and validating how you were feeling due to their own stress, busyness or traumas.

Subtle ways your inner child is wounded that can be equally or even more damaging than obvious wounding.

• Having a parent who is focused on appearance

• Not being allowed your own opinions

• Having parents with high expectations

• Not being accepted for who you are

• A parent denying how you feel

• Constantly being compared with others

As humans we have very powerful thinking minds which we use to understand the world. You may think that you have let go of the past by understanding what happened. But there is much more to the healing process than mental understanding alone.

Healing your wounded inner child parts is a FEELING process.

Inner child healing involves -

• acknowledging the pain without trying to fix it, change it or apologise for it

• processing and releasing the unexpressed emotions

• giving the wounded part the validation & compassion it didn't receive

• forgiving yourself or those who you perceive have hurt you

While what happened to you in the past was not your fault, healing you wounded inner child is up to you. No one else knows, can access or heal your inner child except you.

Once your wounded inner child is healed, your adult self will experience a sense of calm, happiness, confidence, and inner peace.